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back when i was a cop in the bronx
Aug 3rd, 2010 by micah the admin

I’m waiting in line at Walmart with my young baby. It’s a holiday weekend, and the place is packed. I’ve been standing there about thirty minutes, and it’s almost my turn, when the man in front of me suddenly notices my baby and strikes up a conversation. He’s massively tall, middle-aged, with long, straggly gray hair, and has glasses with what looks like a wadded up napkin behind one of the lenses. Despite his odd appearance, we’re having a nice normal conversation. My baby starts to fuss, and I mention that I really need to get him home to feed him. At this, our conversation takes a disturbing turn. He casually mentions that he used to breastfeed when he was a cop in the Bronx. I think “There is no way he said what I think he said. I must have misheard him”. He then proceeds to go on and on about his life as a cop in the Bronx, and all the terrible child abuse he’s seen, and how he was a detective and they transferred him to this area. I smile and nod politely. He is clearly out of his mind. It’s almost my turn at the register, but I pretend I forgot something and politely excuse myself. Then I go stand in another line for half an hour.

Rachel – NH

you are a gal, right?
Feb 9th, 2010 by micah the admin

I am a man. When I worked at Wal-Mart I had slightly longer hair about chin length and no beard. I was standing in the front of the store and was approached by an elderly woman. She got really close to me and asked in a quiet voice if I could tell that she had wet herself. This was awkward. I looked down at her and couldn’t tell, so I told her that I couldn’t. She looked up at me and squinted. Then she asked, “You are a gal, right?”

I said, “No. Sorry.” She walked away.

Micah the Admin

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